We at PSXNATION have been trying for the longest time to get a reviewable DVD of Dimension Films' "Halloween: H2O," the follow-up to the abysmal mid-90's horror flick "Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers." Either the rental stores here in New York City or Waco (TX) don't carry enough DVD rental copies or somebody stole them because we just can't find any! Anyway, you know a horror series is in trouble when the producers stop numbering the sequels. "H2O" (the seventh "Halloween" film) wasn't half-bad in its attempt to ride the wave of popularity the "Scream" series generated, as well as ignoring any "Halloween" installment prior to the first two. Written by Kevin Williamson (the "Scream" trilogy, creator of TV's "Dawson's Creek"), directed by Steven Miner (a veteran of the first three "Friday the 13th" movies) and starring Jamie Lee Curtis (her first stab at the role that made her famous in almost two decades) and a then-rising Josh Harnett in title roles, "H2O" was decent. The movie ended with what appeared to be Michael Myers' death at the hands of his sister Laurie Strode (Curtis), who beheads him with one mean and sharp ax.
"Halloween: Resurrection" clumsily attempts to explain early on that it wasn't really Michael Myers who got his noggin cut off by Laurie. Using some confusing flashback cutaways that make absolutely no sense whatsoever (was that an oxymoron?) we get the basic message: Michael's alive, Laurie (raddled with guilt for axing the wrong person) is in a mental institution and rent-a-cop security personnel is walking around leaving doors unlocked and their guard down. Before you can mutter to yourself 'haven't I seen before in like a million other horror flicks before?' Laurie is running away from Michael through the hospital corridors. Before the movie's first reel has finished unspooling from the projector Laurie is no more, having kissed her brother in the lips (EEEEEUUUU!) and taken one sharp knife in the back for exhibiting the same stupidity toward Myers that legions of dumb horror movie characters exhibited in the past (i.e. kill before launching into a speech!). It's a landmark moment in the entire "Halloween" saga, since Michael Myers' sole reason for being since the very beginning was to inflict harm to either Laurie Strode or (in the lesser sequels) her relatives.
So, having ridden itself of Laurie Strode in the movie's first act, what does director Rick Rosenthal ("Halloween II") have to hold the viewer's attention? Why a digital voyeur internet show into the bowels of the abandoned Strode residence of Michael's youth, of course! Organized by sleazy but fun-loving producer Freddie Harris (Busta Rhymes) and his assistant Nora (Tanya Banks) for a company called Dangertainment (oh please!), the catch of the voyeur show is that the chosen participants will each have digital cameras attached to their heads. That way internet audiences watching on Halloween night can switch at will between nice-but-vulnerable Sara Moyer (Bianca Koylish), slutty blonde Jena (Katee Sackhoff), good guy Rudy (Sean Patrick Thomas), rebel kid Jim (Luke Kirby) and a few others. Scripted events await the gang as it attempts to survive the night inside Michael's house, but guess what unannounced guest pops up unexpectedly to turn the make-believe horror into a gruesome (virtual) reality? Here's a hint: it's NOT the Michael Myers you're thinking off, and his obsession with martial arts leads to a handful of confrontations and scenes that are the unexpected highlight of the entire "Resurrection" experience (Ch.9 in particular).
As its tepid box office receipts during the summer of 2002 will probably remind Dimension Film executives, "Resurrection" failed to match even the lowered expectations those of us that went to see it opening night (fully aware that it was going to suck) had about it. Audiences have grown wary of manipulative gimmicks or stupid lapses of logic to keep horror franchises ringing, and "Resurrection's" digital camera perspectives don't make up for the complete lack of fear or gore that its handful of seen-coming-from-miles-away shocks generate. It's worth a rental to have a few cheap thrills with girlfriends or friends who don't know any better, but as a whole "Resurrection" won't do for its ailing Michael Myers character what its own name implies: resurrect a moribund horror franchise from audience fatigue.
The Disc:
Shot using a combination of hand-held digital cameras and normal 35mm Panavision one's, "Halloween: Resurrection" looks as clear, dark, obfuscated or 'artificially dirty' as its creators want it to look. On the whole though, the movie's Widescreen Anamorphic (2:35:1) Video Transfer looks solid with near-perfect pitch-black scenes and artificially lit scenes that don't degenerate into "X-Files"-type graininess. Director Rick Rosenthal and Editor Robert Ferretti's Commentary Track focuses much of its running time to explaining how the digital camera footage and the standard film takes were shot and then combined during post-production. I can't imagine anybody outside the DVD-watching and movie-making community finding this commentary remotely interesting. A Webcam Special, however, chronicles into a 41 min. video feature the many hours of portable camera and stationary camera footage shot for "Resurrection." I don't know about you folks, but looking at 40+ minutes of dark and grainy digital video with a commentator (director Rosenthal) DOES NOT make for an entertaining DVD bonus feature.
Other extras include Six Deleted Scenes (is that Michael Myers driving a red muscle car like the one he drove in "Halloween 5"?), Three Alternate Endings (which are just as bad or worse than the one left in the final cut of the film), 'Tour of the Set with Production Designer Troy Hansen' Featurette (6:53 min.), Five Storyboard Comparisons (check picture to the right of this review), 'Sneak Peek' Trailers (for "Gangs of New York," "Halloween: Curse of Michael Myers & H2O" and "Scream DVD Collection") and yet another 'Head Cam' Featurette (4:10). The only featurette remotely interesting is 'On the Set with Jamie Lee' (4:05 min.), since it covers the shoot of what will likely be the final scene the actress will ever do for a "Halloween" movie (and if you can't grasp the significance of that last phrase then you're not a fan). Saving the score a little is a decent English Dolby Digital 5.1 Surround Soundtrack that keeps the sound effects and music score loud, clear and ready to give those viewers not paying attention a good old jolt of adrenaline. The dialogue from the condemned-to-die-by-being-cast-teen-lookalikes, unfortunately, also benefits from being coded in Dolby 5.1. :-(
bottom line:
Unless the powers that be at Dimension Films/Miramax see fit to resurrect Michael Myers in some sort of crossover
'Battle of the Horror All-Stars' gimmick (ala New Line Cinema's upcoming "Freddy vs. Jason" movie), the "Halloween" series should just end. This barely amusing jumble of hi-tech gizmos and horror genre clichés looks/sounds good and packs decent DVD extras to boot. Too bad "Halloween: Resurrection" is also plagued by unlikable characters, bad actors (except for Busta Rhymes), bigger-than-Texas plot holes (wasn't Michael beheaded in the previous movie?), minimal gore/nudity and zero originality. No wonder Jamie Lee Curtis jumped ship before the first reel ended!
By - J.M. Vargas
